Faith is a funny thing....

“You know how when you were a little kid and you believed in fairy tales, that fantasy of what your life would be, a white dress, prince charming who would carry you away to a castle on a hill. You would lie in bed at night and close your eyes and you had complete and utter faith. Santa Claus, the Tooth Fairy, Prince Charming, they were so close you could taste them, but eventually you grow up, one day you open your eyes and the fairy tale disappears. Most people turn to the things and people they can trust. But the thing is it’s hard to let go of that fairy tale entirely because almost everyone has that smallest bit of hope, of faith, that one day they will open their eyes and it will come true…”

My heart hurts as I write today’s blog, but not for myself. As most of you know I have been divorced for almost 4 years. I endured a lot of hard times and my marriage broke me down to the point I thought I would never return to who I was. I am fortunate in those times the people that surrounded me showed me compassion and held a mirror to my face to remind me how beautiful and great I was. They laughed at my jokes and cried with me in pain. I never returned to the Heather that I was before my marriage but, I did become someone even better than she ever was.

This blog is not about me though. I felt a lot of pain in those years but recently some of my best friends (my sisters if you will) are going through some of the same or maybe their stories are slightly different but I for some reason feel my heart breaking to pieces as their world changes around them. My girlfriend and I were talking the other day and we laughed because the reality of it is if you are so tied to a person and connected so emotionally you truly know what it is like to be so happy when their happy and to break when they break to miss someone because they are missing someone. As I sit here and think of these amazing women I think She is my friend. She's my family. My insides. She will be fine because she has to be fine. That's how important she is to me. To these women I know you may feel, deep down, that you're somehow flawed or broken. Wronged or fooled. Here is my advice to you..

Today is a new start I know that these days in your life seem like the hardest thing you will ever have to go through. Keep your head up and remember that this pain will not last forever even though it feels like it will.

Look at this time as an opportunity to restart your life, but on your terms. Take time to look to the future and think about what you really want (not what you think others expect you to be or do) and come up with a vision of your ideal new life. Then ask yourself "how" you can achieve that.

Don't allow others to make light of your situation. Don't lose your morals, ethics and values

Be aware of your vulnerability

Stick close to those who love you!

Do whatever you feel like doing. You know what you need the most...better than anyone. If you need flowers, buy them. Candles, light them. A walk, go for one. Go shopping, take a bath, listen to relaxing music, get a massage. You deserve it!

And lastly, learn to love yourself, every flaw, every stretch mark, lump or wrinkle. Find you...she is wonderful. (Trust me, I know)


At the end of the day faith is a funny thing. It turns up when you don't really expect it. It's like one day you realize that the fairy tale may be slightly different than you dreamed. The castle, well, it may not be a castle. And it's not so important to have happy ever after, just that it’s happy right now.